I have been wondering is it because it's him when I realised the core problem, me.

I've wanted to be the leader in everything and as perfectionist, I always believe things can be better. Hence, I want to control because the rest will just let it pass. I want it exactly perfect. Maybe it's time for me to start following. This sounds extremely weird and I'm not very sure if this is the right phrasing. Oh, I should put it this way: maybe it's time for me to start working with others. But no, I can work with others even as leader. No no, maybe it's time for me to accept other operating means.

Hell, whatever. One thing I know is it's important to be able to work well with my team.

Come to think about it, I've never been this active in my secondary/JC days. I was the one following and doing exactly what I was told to, without finding out the process. I shudder whenever I think of what I was; I despise that me. (I've been thinking recently of what I used to be, how I managed to follow others like a dog, because I realised I'm actually leading.)

I know exactly that I'm trying too hard to lead, thinking that I can do it well. And I hate this me as well. I guess I'm just an extremist. I need to juggle myself well.

Spank me, I'm updating my third entry when I should be mugging for BusStats.